Conversations Overheard at Work

And once again, we bring you, Conversations Overheard at Work! For those just tuning in, this is a segment in which I collect snippets heard around the office at my book publisher. This time, in addition to eavesdropping on the editors and designers who work on cookbooks, I've included a couple of gems from our lifestyles department. See if you can guess who is who!

"I feel like I want some more croutons. Yes. Definitely more croutons."

"I would totally pepper that."

"She eats snails from her own garden? Sounds . . . earthy."

"Yes, we definitely have soup. I think they might owe us chicken. They gave us soup, they owe us chicken. No, I know. I'll be really upset if they still owe us chicken."

"What sounds more salad-y? Duck Breast with Winter Greens, or Winter Greens with Duck Breast? I mean, I realize this is a bit nebulous."

"Braised leeks, absolutely not. A leek gratin? Yes. That's totally different."

"Does wheatgrass-carrot elixir need to be hyphenated?"

"Roger, how was the sex party?"

"Well, what does 'newlywed' mean? A heterosexual couple standing side by side rolling out dough together?"

"Baklava?! See, this is just completely arbitrary."

"Well, I suggested a watermelon, feta, and mint salad, but I know, watermelon salads are so overdone."

"Schnitzel is kind of hot right now. Wait, do I mean schnitzel? Oh right. Spaetzle. Spaetzle is super hot right now."

"The author is this big Christmas expert, so it would be great if we put him in touch with marketing."

"She's also concerned about the starchy gratins. Well, no. She's concerned about all of the gratins."

"Let's beef it up. Literally."

Editor: "Legos are so hot right now, it's ridiculous."

Marketing: "A lot of those pieces are from the Harry Potter set. [Long pause.] Don't ask me how I know that."

Conversations Overheard at Work

And now, we present to you a new segment titled Conversations Overheard at Work! Working on cookbooks is really fun. In addition to getting to look at pictures of cheese whenever you want to, people tend to have a lot of serious conversations which sometimes sound strange out of context. I've been compiling a collection of snippets which amused me. Hope you enjoy!

"We need to talk. They're really upset about the cornichons."

"No, they're not happy with that. We need less of a minty green. More of an arugula-y green."

[Publisher]: "Yeah, sandwiches are like a really big thing these days, right?"

[Editor 1]: "Sandwiches are like, really big right now. Like, huge."

[Editor 2]: "Seriously, you guys. Huge."

"I mean, seriously. People freaking know how to toast nuts."

"And then just write something about, you know, firesides, bacon. . . you know what I mean."

"I really need to talk to you about waffles."

"Oh my god you guys, we need to meet so I can tell you about this salad I had yesterday!"

[Discussing a current baking trend, so-called "cake pops."] "Are you serious? They mash up cake and frosting? That is absolutely disgusting. If any of my friends ever asked me to make that, I'd tell them where they can put a cake pop."

"So if you could just, say, draft a list of every food adjective you can think of, that would be perfect. Great. Thanks!"

"Ugh. I am so sick of reading soup recipes. It's like, put some vegetables in a pan. Saute them. Puree them. Don't puree them. Figure it out."

"Just add some freaking watercress and we'll call it a day."

"Ooh 'wooden spoon'! I love that. That's adorable."

"Actually, he felt really strongly about the Douglas fir tips."

"Well, you know me and kale."

"I mean, really? That's the third occurrence of dandelion greens."

"I think it would be really nice to have a friendly offal in there."